Birds birds birds

Birds birds birds

I think I mentioned that my first word, according to my grandma, was "bird." I'm sure others will argue with her, but I love it so I'm sticking with it. She used to sing the song "Bye Bye Blackbird" to me - I can remember her bouncing me on her shoulder while she stirred her soup with her free hand. I have a fascination with birds, so I think it's actually true. Big Bird (not that he technically counts as a bird, but so what) was my favorite Sesame Street character, partly because he is YELLOW and he has such...
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“Cookie”

More than 25 years ago, after my parents divorced, my mother dropped me off at my great-grandparents’ house for the afternoon. I don’t even remember the reason. I do remember walking up the steps to their front door. I remember the paint-chipped stone lions and the brown-bruised magnolia petals strewn along the grass near their furry gray buds that reminded me of tiny mice. When I pressed the doorbell, the chime sank in my chest like the tune of a church organ. Mama Ev peeked through the vertical blinds and opened the door. “Hiya, Cookie,” she said, grinning. She planted...
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Journey

Journey

Written many years ago, when I was in my 20s and when running ruled my life. I do not have a driver’s license. I am 22 years old.  Normally, I rely on friends and relatives to drive me places. Lately, I’ve remained in my house for weeks, feeling guilty and ashamed. I hadn’t even stepped out the door to check the weather. I have paced my one-bedroom apartment and listened to nothing but the hum of my refrigerator, the tick of my clock and the sound of a man’s heavy boots clopping against the floor above my head.  Last Wednesday,...
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Welcome to My Mind. Pull Up a Chair.

Welcome to My Mind. Pull Up a Chair.

When I was a cute, gap-toothed seven-year-old with a mullet and crooked bangs, I struggled with writing the alphabet, putting shapes together, drawing figures and coloring inside the lines. According to my early childhood report cards, I was disorganized, scattered, and didn't know when to stop talking. During class I often wrote silly rhymes, then got a thrill from scribbling on the chalkboard when the classroom was empty.  Little did I know I'd have so much fun breaking similar rules later on in life. But not until after I'd tortured myself trying to be the perfectly scrupulous, model straight-A  goody-two...
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There Ain’t No Road Too Long

There Ain’t No Road Too Long

I am a grown-ass woman, but I'm perpetually obsessed with the same things many 80s millennials love: Care Bears, Alvin and the Chipmunks, Big Bird, and rainbow-colored everything. Our parents can't believe we still haven't grown up. For one thing, we were given candy necklaces to suck on while we watched traumatizing cartoons created by adults who didn't know how to protect the sensitivity of children. Take for example, the Sesame Street movie "Follow That Bird" from 1985. Spoiler alert ahead, FYI. A sad scene followed by a happy scene, so keep reading. I was just a kid, shocked at...
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I’m an old soul with a young and wild heart, unearthing more of myself each day.

I’m an old soul with a young and wild heart, unearthing more of myself each day.

My very first word was "bird." How appropriate, since I've kept myself in a cage for years until the hunger to discover my gifts and talents began eating away at me. "Who are you, what are you doing with your life, what is your tagline?" The answer is not a bubble you fill in on a standardized test or multiple choice survey. It's much, much bigger than that. For all of us. When you begin the process of self-discovery and find that you can’t define yourself with one word or one sentence, that can be scary. We may have a...
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